Beautiful

There are times when I feel swallowed by all the pain, loss and sorrow in the world. I want to make a difference. I hurt for the people who hurt. I want to change it all, to steal it all away and replace it with joy and love and peace. Especially this Christmas. It hurts my heart to not be able to give and share with the people I love. I really do have a heart for people, and as irritable as I can get sometimes, I want to give all those people a giant hug and wipe away their tears and tell them it will be okay, and be able to mean it, I want to have the power to make it all better. Sometimes I tell people it will be okay, even though I know it won't. Sometimes I have to be strong so that other people can be strong, even though my heart cries out within me that I'm terrified, that I'm weak, that I can't do it. But even though I can't make it all better, I have a Father who can, and I can talk to him and cry to him any time I need to. My favorite scripture is Zephaniah 3:17, “The Lord your God in your midst, the mighty One; He will save. He will rejoice over you with gladness, He will quiet you with His love, He will rejoice over you with singing.” It's my favorite scripture because it reminds me that God is closer than an intangible being. He is as close to me as a Father, who takes delight in me in spite of my failures and imperfections. He cares deeply for me, and He is in control of the universe and all it's events. So I don't have to be afraid, even though I know I'll continue to be. I can make a huge difference just by talking to my Father about my fears for myself and for others, and my sorrows and pains. I know He will provide, I know He will always be there for me. Even if I lose all that I own, and all that makes me feel safe, and I'm all alone in this world, I can never lose His love. I am full of fear, not so much for myself, but for those that I care about. I want to save all of them from ever having to hurt, and I am very afraid of losing them. I can't save them. But Jesus can. Jesus did. There will always be pain in the world. But it won't be forever. Someday everything will be returned to it's original design and intent, and we will be closer to God than we could have ever imagined. There will be no more tears, no more pain, no more brokenness. And it will be beautiful.